i have been in new york almost 9 months now, and an email from the past crops up and may pull me back to sf. it's strange, to think about going back. new york has wrapped its slender arms around me in an addictive way [they say san francisco and new york are like marijuana and cocaine]. there's a madness crawling under the streets here, a crazy pulse to the night.

but if i love new york for the nightlife, i love san francisco for the lifestyle. is it that easy to break up? we'll see.

in the meantime, i am jobless. coming back to dA is to be reminded of old ghosts, strange and unfamiliar voices echoing around. steve follows me like a shadow now, like the one i made for him so long ago. i wonder where that led him, if he knew i meant beauty when i drew sadness.

really, i just hope he never took another look at it.